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you broke into the private affairs of your wife and now you know. You felt like there was something fishy and found out you were right to a certain degree. You know that at a minimum they were having a lot of contact, what you don't know is exactly where this was leading. One strong point you need to make clear in your head .while you had some responsibility in the troubled state of your marriage, you are in no way responsible for your wife's reaction and actions to that. How she dealt with her dissatisfaction with the relationship is on HER. Not you. You both need to own your own shit. What's most problematic is you know how your wife reacts to issues within her relationship..she seeks the attention elsewhere. She gets something out of this guy's attention. What are you going to do now? You know and you're hiding your bad behavior by trying to act like you don't know about her's. Come clean dude lay it out. WHY are you untrusting? TELL HER. Bridge the gaps of communication for fuck sake. She lie to you, she is perfectly willing to hide the truth and so are you. You felt she was lying you sensed it, you don't trust her so you checked and found out you were RIGHT and became a liar when you did. I'm not going to lie to you this 'confession' might lead to a complete breakdown and all the bad shit you are afraid of could come out of it. Anger, hurt and loss of the marriage yup, could explode so you better get another point straight in your head why confront and admit your deceptions? Well if I wanted to try and salvage a relationship I sure as hell wouldn't want to salvage a BAD one. A bad one SHOULD end and hopefully this is the catalyst for a GOOD one to begin. That is if that's your motivation. Make sure you state intention first if you're just trying to work around all this fuck that, you won't ever get a decent relationship. And the magic eight ball says the odds aren't real good so buckle in for some work
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