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Damn the we sucked tonight hopefully the first string players actually PLAY football this coming . hopefully. Other than that, I enjoyed the evening with the folks and attempted to tell my sister about my "flirtation" from the other day . dont know what kind of reaction I got other than she walked away rather quickly trying to say goodnight. Lovely. At least I gave it a shot in talking to her about me, right? I guess I'll know more when I her tomorrow at my fathers birthday dinner. That or I'll just let her go on and on about HER life and boyfriend and all be fine. *le sigh* Ive been listening to alot of Robbins stuff lately trying to make goals and achieve some of the things Ive been putting off in my life. I feel so motivated and yet life seems to move slow hurry up and wait hurry up and wait. Yet turning 30 in 8 days seems like a mile marker with not much headway made. Yes I have a beautiful family but I cant afford the crew I have and even though I start my new job and have been working on my career/financial goals/life I'm not there yet and I dont have someone to enjoy it with. I find myself increasingly eager to get to the next stage of life but that its all going by so quickly. I guess I spit this all out here because everyone understands the crossroads we face in life I guess Im just looking for how to be productivly content without getting discouraged in every part of my life. I wish my goals would come quicker while keeping me and the babies . they are already growing up way to quick but I want to be able to be in a better place for them and myself as as possible. Hurry up and wait hurry up and wait No need to respond I guess . I just needed to vent some.

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