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You're not responsible for them and you can't control them. Someone's emotional reaction to something you have to say isn't your responsibility, and it's not even within your control. It's entirely them. As as I stopped taking responsibility for people's reactions, and realized that when you say something, there are a hundred different ways to react to it, and the other person, the person with the trigger, is the one causing the problem, I stopped working so hard trying to avoid setting off triggers. And so much energy goes into that. And it gets so draining. And guess what, triggers still go off. In a good relationship communication can be hard, but it's not hard because of triggers. If your partner has an emotional reaction to something you have to say, well, if they're really your partner and you guys are really tight, they can ought to be able to deal with your message. And when both people have the same intentions, stuff works out. I can't tell you how much easier and more fulfilling life is these days, now that I understand this. Your triggers are your problem, not mine. We all get to say what we want.
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